[MUSIC PLAYING]
NANA [VOICEOVER]: There was a saying in my village
when I was a girl that a laugh is like wine.
Just enough makes happiness.
Too much makes a fool.
Years after I first heard this, I came to know two such fools.
Nick and Alicia were born under the same moon in the same month
of the same year.
Their fathers owned vineyards in the same valley in America.
There was another-- a poor boy named
Johnny Anselmi who worked in the fields for Alicia's father.
Johnny was everything Nick was not.
He was hard working, and he loved Alicia the way
the soil loved her father's grapes.
And as we all know, what is in the soil is in the grape.
And the what is in the grape is in the wine.
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
It was the hope of both families that Nick and Alicia
would fall in love and marry, and
the two vineyards would be one.
But God had different plans.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Johnny and Alicia grew up together
as best friends, which is exactly
what a man must never be--
Hello, ladies.
Hi, Nick.
NANA [VOICEOVER]: --to the woman he wants.
Johnny was Alicia's rock.
But Nick Di Cenzo was her fire.
What is wrong you, huh?
- I'm not talking to you. - No, you're not talking to me.
You're talking [INAUDIBLE]. GIRL: She's so jealous.
There you go now. Here we go.
NANA [VOICEOVER]: Their hearts ached with a blazing passion
reserved for the young.
When Nick told her he was going off to join
the army to see the world--
I've already made this [INAUDIBLE]..
NANA [VOICEOVER]: --Alicia had mixed feelings.
[SLAP]
Again with the slapping.
Always with the slapping.
Alicia!
NANA [VOICEOVER]: What the young do
not know is that there is a difference
between passion and love.
[CRYING]
NANA [VOICEOVER]: What the young do not know is a lot.
Oh, I'm sorry, gents.
That's what we call a full house.
Ah.
Oh, god.
Oh.
NANA [VOICEOVER]: No one knew where the ring came from.
NICK: Whose is this?
NANA [VOICEOVER]: None of the other soldiers admitted
to putting it on the table.
SOLDIER: Beats me.
NANA [VOICEOVER]: And yet, there it was.
[THUNDER]
Nick made up his mind.
He would send the ring to Alicia and ask her to marry him.
If she accepted the ring, it would be his fate.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[DOOR SQUEAKING]
[THUMP]
[RUSTLING]
Do you feel that?
MAN: Welcome to California.
[THUMP]
MAN: Holy mashed potatoes.
[MUSIC - "JINGLE BELLS"]
NANA [VOICEOVER]: As the days passed
and Nick heard nothing of the ring, his love
and his family's friendship with the Rosas turned to bitterness.
For Alicia, Nick's silence only meant that he
had forgotten her for another.
[SPLAT]
The Rosas and the Di Cenzos never spoke to or of each other
again.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Nick never married.
He learned to live with his sorrow.
Alicia married her best friend, Johnny.
Ready?
Here we go.
NANA [VOICEOVER]: And had a daughter named Sara.
- OK. - Smile.
Look at the camera.
[FLASH]
NANA [VOICEOVER]: And all of them lived happily ever after--
as happy as fools.
And if you believe me--
Oh, this is going to be a nightmare.
NANA [VOICEOVER]: Then you are the biggest the fool of all.
[CHUCKLING]
Eat a grape.
Hmm.
18-- 18.5.
That's about two and 1/2 weeks to harvest.
18.5.
Right?
That's my girl.
[CHUCKLING] Now relax.
Just take it easy.
It's going to be a walk in the park.
Dad, what three minutes of your 40-year
marriage with Ma has ever been a walk in the park?
Uh, give me a minute.
[CHUCKLING] Sara, you know your mother.
It's not what you say. It's how you say it.
OK. So the part about the Di Cenzos.
How do I say that?
You don't say it.
Right.
Just give her the broad strokes, you know?
Broad strokes?
How about we're going to partner up with some investors
and risk everything we own.
How about that?
I think that's a little too broad.
I'll just say, Ma, sit down.
Shut up.
Sign papers. JOHNNY: That's very good.
Yeah?
Brian will be there at 1:00, OK?
Don't be late. I need you.
You're my partner. - I am your partner.
SARA: You are. [SPEAKING ITALIAN]
JOHNNY: [SPEAKING ITALIAN]
[CLICKS TONGUE] [HOOF BEATS]
JOHNNY: Pavarotti, we're going to take care of this,
aren't we? Huh?
[PAVAROTTI WHIMPERS] Sing with me.
Sing with me. [HOWLING]
[PAVAROTTI HOWLING]
[BOTH HOWLING]
[MUSIC PLAYING]
No, that's not gonna work.
OK, so [INAUDIBLE].
Where have you been?
Did you get the boards?
OK.
Business class is fine.
Yeah. Hi.
- Get the boards? - They're in the car.
You're not going to say hello first?
I am. Hello.
We need those visuals.
- Here's the proposal. - Good.
I have the boards, color charts, our board projections,
and a letter from the Pope.
SARA: You know what?
These are too technical.
Dad said just give her the broad strokes.
BRIAN: I can talk a group of investors out of $2.5 million.
I can get your mother to partner with them.
Yeah, well, your investors don't have
a history with the Di Cenzos.
Don't worry.
It'll work out.
Where are you going?
Gonna get the boards.
Yeah, OK.
Yeah, that's good.
See, Alicia, 10 years ago, this was all Angelotti's.
This, the Russo's.
And this, Gimignano's.
Now this is all Kendall Jackson.
This-- all Mondavi.
I know.
But a wine you want to call ammonia.
People don't drink ammonia.
They clean with it.
SARA: Ma, it's our Armonia.
It's the name of the investment group--
Armonia investment group.
Brian?
If you look at page seven on the prospectus--
JOHNNY: Brian, keep with the broad strokes.
Yeah, give me what he said. [PHONE RINGING]
- Yeah, Aggie. - It's not Aggie.
It's Alicia.
- No, not you. - Who?
Me? When?
You? BRIAN: No, no.
No. I can't do Wednesday.
ALICIA: You know, Sara, just before your grandfather died--
when he went, uh--
it was just like this
BRIAN: OK.
Tell him I'll reschedule.
Sorry, Alicia.
Brian, could you--
[THUMP]
ALICIA: Partners-- why do we need partners?
This is a family business.
SARA: Mom, I'm having trouble getting
distributors to pay attention to us because we're too small.
If we don't expand, that whole map is going to be one color.
And that's 100 years of Rosa family
history just disappearing.
BRIAN: Basically it's eat or be eaten.
ALICIA: I know, but investors-- corporations.
It's so cold.
Johnny.
JOHNNY: It's a different world now, Al.
And if we're going to be thinking
about Sara and her kids--
And Brian.
JOHNNY: Yeah, and Brian.
Ma, what would Pop have done?
JOHNNY: Al, she doesn't talk.
ALICIA: She talks.
She can talk as good as you.
She just won't do it.
Why not? ALICIA: I don't know.
Ever since Pop died.
His whole life she never shut up.
Now when I want her to talk, I get Harpo Marx.
SARA: Ma, could we just focus on the--
ALICIA: OK.
This additional 150 acres--
where are they?
Dad, do you want to--
Well, I think Brian probably knows the map
a little better than me.
BRIAN: Well actually, Sara found the properties.
Um-- you know, there's this additional property.
Yeah.
SARA: Well, you know how hard it is to find old vines.
And when the old man died, he left it to his brother
Nick and his son Tony.
ALICIA: Don't say another word.
No.
The Di Cenzos?
No.
SARA: [SIGHING]
BRIAN: [EXHALING]
[STOMPING]
[EXHALING]
[RIP]
OK.
Well, that didn't work.
SARA: [SIGHING]
[MUSIC PLAYING]
To my little brother Charlie.
To Pop.
[CLINK]
[CHUCKLING]
I'm renting a truck.
Anything we don't want, I thought
I'd take down to the church.
Ah, this is all that's left of the Di Cenzos, eh?
You, me, and this room that's full of things.
Memories.
Oh, my mother.
This was hers.
I remember her hands in this bowl, mixing the arancini.
TONY: You want the bowl, Uncle Nick?
Take the bowl.
What am I going to do with a bowl?
It's got a crack in it, too.
You want it? - No.
Eh, I don't blame you.
Junk.
So where are you thinking of settling?
You staying here or you going back to Europe?
TONY: Well, after we get everything packed up and sold,
I'm heading down to Los Angeles.
Gonna open my own restaurant.
[BLOWING] LA.
Oofa.
The women are all too skinny, with the fake boobs
and the surprised look--
[SPEAKING ITALIAN]
And now this--
[POUNDING TABLE]
This is something you can get your hands around, eh?
[SPEAKING ITALIAN]
Look at the rear end that's built for speed, eh?
[LAUGHING] Now this-- this you didn't get from your dad, eh?
This you got from me.
[LAUGHING]
Ah, your Dad.
He always was after you to settle down, eh?
Mm.
You know what, Uncle Nick?
You can get a piece of lasagna make you go straight to heaven.
Mm.
TONY: Then you'll get that same lasagna,
breakfast, lunch, dinner--
after about three days, you want to kill yourself,
you don't get a little veal scaloppine soon.
You know what I mean?
Salute, scaloppine.
Salute.
Hey, you want this?
What is it?
I don't know.
Sure, I'll take it.
Oh, look.
What is that?
It's the book from your father's wake.
All the people who paid their respect.
Look at this.
Wow.
So many people.
NICK: Everybody but the Rosas.
Yeah.
Well, you wouldn't have let them in.
Eh.
Well, they should have had the decency to show
up so I coulda thrown them out.
You know, you lay down with dogs, you wake up with fleas.
TONY: What, the Rosas gave you fleas?
Eh.
I don't want to talk about it.
ALICIA: I don't want to talk about it.
I will not touch the Di Cenzo land.
It's poison.
Poison.
I spit on that land.
[SPITTING]
Ma, the Di Cenzos have the best
Merlot grapes in the valley.
That's true, Al.
Poison.
But with our Cab, the blend would be a gold mine.
I would never even set foot on that land,
let alone give those miserable skeeves one dime for it.
It's my dream, Ma.
Oh, yeah?
I had a dream once, too.
I dreamed I was giving an elephant
a haircut in the living room.
I need those grapes.
[SPEAKING ITALIAN] Johnny, you gotta trim in here.
Dad.
[PHONE RINGING]
This is Brian.
Yeah.
Yeah, I did.
I love it, but I can't talk now.
OK.
I'll call you later.
What's so funny?
I was just thinking.
You know, life is so strange.
I remember when the Di Cenzos were big.
Merlot, Cabernet.
Franc-- couldn't touch it. - Yeah.
Big shots.
Remember the old lady?
Remember how she hired that poor woman
to do her ironing like she was the Queen of England?
[CHUCKLING]
ALICIA: Big deal. $2 a week.
Yeah.
And now somebody's going to buy that place
and wipe the name Di Cenzo from the land.
ALICIA: For years, they looked down their noses at us.
You know, Johnny, we should be those people.
JOHNNY: Wow.
Vengeance is no reason to buy land.
ALICIA: We wouldn't be buying the place for vengeance.
You heard Sarah.
The land is good.
Poison, you said.
Ah.
What are you, crazy?
The Di Cenzo grapes were once the greatest of the valley.
Right, Sara?
Well, we could get some old vines in Sonoma.
No, no.
If I'm going to consent to this new direction,
I will only do it if we buy the Di Cenzo place.
No, no.
It's better to have no dealings with the Di Cenzos.
No dealings.
We simply buy the land and burn every trace
of the miserable [SPEAKING ITALIAN]
that ever lived there.
Broad strokes.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[LAUGHING]
My father is such a genius.
- 40 years experience. - Yeah.
Let's celebrate, huh?
I'll take a rain check.
No, I want you to spend the night.
I can't.
I have an 8:00 in Sausalito.
Don't forget to go to Tom to sign the prenup.
Wait a minute.
I thought we were doing that tomorrow.
I already signed.
Oh, I want to do that together, you know?
Try to make it more romantic.
No.
I got to stop by the office tonight.
Crap.
Well, congratulations. - OK.
[KISS] Thanks.
Bye.
SARA: Bye.
[PHONE RINGING]
Oh.
Hey, this is Brian.
Hello?
I love you.
[CAR STARTING]
Hey, I can't hear you.
You're breaking up. Just kidding.
[CHUCKLING]
[SIGHING]
ALICIA: Johnny.
I got [INAUDIBLE] from this.
JOHNNY: Oh, yeah?
You want a glass of water?
ALICIA: Yeah.
You know, Sara knows what she's doing.
[EXHALING] It's a big risk.
Remember what she was like when she was five years old?
Eh?
You tell her, don't go in the pond.
And we find her in the ocean.
Eh?
And then later when she was 12 years old
and I didn't want her to drive the truck, you remember that?
And she taught herself how to hot wire the ignition.
I died 1,000 deaths.
JOHNNY: I remember.
The point is, whatever you tell her she can't do,
bet your money that is exactly what she's going to do.
And this, my darling wife, she did not get from me.
Johnny.
Yeah?
When we go to sign the papers--
Yeah.
I want to do it separate.
I don't want to be in the same room with Nick Di Cenzo.
OK.
[EXHALING]
NICK: It's an ammonia company?
You gonna make a ammonia out of my grapes?
No.
That's a typo.
It's the-- it's Armonia.
The Armonia investment group out of Sacramento.
[SPEAKING ITALIAN]
A bunch of lawyers want to make wine.
I guess they think it's romantic.
Romantic, eh?
Picking dead frogs out of grapes.
Sheeby, enough of it.
Ciao, baby.
Well, if you're comfortable with the offer,
I could drop the papers.
Unless, of course, you have your own lawyer you'd like to use.
Hey, Paula.
I'm here for my 10 o'clock.
I have a proctologist.
[LAUGHS]
NICK DI CENZO: You better do it.
I'll come back later.
Oh, Sarah, hold on for a second.
Would you please pull up the Excel--
That's OK.
[INAUDIBLE]
- I don't need to. - It's not a problem.
I don't-- I don't want to interrupt.
I want you to meet everybody.
Now, do we know everyone?
Have you all met Sara Anselmi?
Nick Di Cenzo.
Ah, [INAUDIBLE].
And his nephew, Tony.
Sarah Anselmi.
I remember you, from high school.
Oh, yes. Hi.
You grew up nice.
What a relief.
You're welcome.
We were just discussing your offer.
Your offer?
Here's your prenup.
Brian already signed it.
- Who's Brian? - Prenup?
I thought we were selling some land.
We have to marry somebody?
Well, Sarah's family's buying your place.
I thought it was a bunch of lawyers out of Sacramento.
It is. Exactly.
- Yeah, you told me-- - But it's a partnership.
Tom, we don't have to discuss this right now.
Your family, Anselmi.
Who's your mother?
Alicia.
Alicia Rosa, exactly like the mother.
It's in the eyes.
That fire in your eyes, I see that and my head hurts.
Do we have some problem?
Oh no, just a little one.
I would rather take every inch of our 150 acres
and stuff it up my woohoo than sell it to the Rosas.
You-- you tried to hide behind some bunch of lawyers.
No, we weren't hiding. We're partners.
Once more, once more God saves me from the Rosas.
Uncle Nick, calm down.
You go home and you tell your mother this,
this is what Nick Di Cenzo gives to the Rosas.
Fongi.
You understand?
Nothing.
No sale.
Ciao.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Excuse me.
Where did he go?
I don't know.
Probably the shoe shine.
When he's upset, he likes to get his shoes shined.
You shouldn't have lied to us.
Lied?
Nobody lied to anybody.
Oh come on, hiding behind some investment group?
We weren't hiding.
You know, you're not a very trustworthy person.
That explains the prenup. - What?
Prenup.
Well, you're getting married to what's his name, right?
Yes, Brian.
Yeah, well see, he doesn't trust you, either.
Brian trusts me completely.
Oh yeah, but he wants a prenup.
Brian likes to do things in an orderly manner.
He needs-- you know what?
Why am I even telling you this?
This is none of your business.
I just fins all this very fascinating.
Mr. Di Cenzo--
Tony, please.
Mr. Di Cenzo, we are about to enter into a very
complex negotiation. - You and him?
Me and you.
I like that.
You know, I'm sure that this banter works
on a certain type of woman.
Rest assured, I'm not that type. - Well, I'm open-minded.
What type are you?
I'm trying to do a business deal with you
and you're like, hitting on me?
I have a boyfriend.
Besides the guy you're marrying?
No wonder he doesn't trust you.
The guy I'm marrying is the boyfriend.
Ah, simpler that way.
Look, we have put a substantial offer
for your property on the table.
We are a legitimate buyer and I suggest that you get your uncle
to the table to sign.
Whoa.
Did you feel that?
Welcome to California.
Hey, what's this?
Must have gotten shaken up, huh?
It's got a postmark.
Holy mashed potatoes.
[SPEAKING ITALIAN]
Hey, Johnny.
Hey, Ben, how are you doing?
I got something for you.
Oh yeah, what is it?
You won't believe it, but the damnedest thing happened.
Oh yeah?
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Well, believe me, Tom, I wish I knew.
It's some family history, like an Italian whatever.
I don't know.
I just have to figure out a way to get past it.
Tom, can I call you back?
OK, bye.
Uh, ma?
Um, this came in the mail.
I-- I didn't mean to open it, but it was addressed
to Rosa Vineyard, so um, I--
yeah, that's for you.
Is your father in the house?
Um, no.
He's in town.
Brian?
No.
OK.
[SCREAMS]
Ma.
[SCREAMS]
40 years.
40 years I've carried this burning knife in my breast.
This shame, vergogna.
Oh, my heart, it's going a million miles an hour.
Give me some water, water.
No, no, wine.
Wine.
Ma, Nick Di Cenzo.
Oh, spawn of the devil.
But 40 years ago?
I mean, how come it just came today?
Because it is divine mercy.
God has seen fit to give me this present before I die.
When he didn't write, I figured that [SPEAKING ITALIAN]
had found somebody else.
40 years, Ma, I've carried this pain in my breast.
That's so sad.
Sad?
[LAUGHS]
Sad?
I'm going to have a [INAUDIBLE].
I'm going to sing like Caruso.
[HIGH-PITCHED SINGING]
[LAUGHS]
I'm going to go downtown this afternoon
and buy a red dress to wear to that cockroach's funeral,
because I got him.
I got him.
Oh, I got him.
Ma.
[SCREAMS]
40 years I carried that he dumped me,
but he didn't dump me.
I dumped him.
No, you didn't.
You never got the ring.
Oh, but he doesn't know it.
And if he doesn't know it, it doesn't matter.
Is the reason this is why we hated each other?
I got him.
Got what?
You got a 40-year-old letter and a ring.
Nobody dumped anybody.
I got him.
In my hands today, God sent me Nick Di Cenzo's calzones.
Ma, you got to tell him.
Are you insane?
I have the power over him now.
I got you and I didn't even know it.
[LAUGHS]
[SCREAMS]
Ma.
He was so handsome.
I suppose he still is.
Yeah, I suppose.
He's, uh, charming.
Like the devil, but an angel.
I had such a fire for him, Sara, and he was--
he was wild.
He was a wild thing.
He had the eye, you know.
Yeah, the nephew, too.
Oh my god.
He chased everything in a skirt.
Couldn't help himself, poor thing.
You know, there are just men who love women.
How can you be with someone like that?
Because he was there, when it was just him,
my eyes were like stars and my skin would be hot like fire.
He would look at me, Sara, and I couldn't breathe.
Have you have you ever felt like that, honey?
You're scaring me, Ma.
Well, after you do, you don't sleep good.
Well, what about dad?
Thank God Johnny.
Oh my god, thank god Johnny.
Thank God he didn't see this.
I got to get this thing out of here.
Sara, you gotta do this for me.
No.
No, you take him aside.
You give this to him and you say,
Alicia should thought you should have this.
And then what? Explain what happened?
Just say what I'm saying.
Alicia thought you should have this.
But Ma, that would be lying.
Did I ask you to lie?
I'm just saying like a telegram.
Alicia thought you should have this.
Stop. - That would be lying.
Do I want him to have it? Yes.
So it's the truth.
You want more truth?
And choke on it, you filthy chucho.
Ma, he wanted you to marry him.
That's not fair.
Fair?
This is between a man and a woman.
That has nothing to do with it.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Hi.
I was looking for your uncle.
He's got a head like titanium.
You're wasting your time.
Well, I wasn't going to talk to him about that, exactly.
There's been a development, a development that
might change the situation.
What kind of development?
Oh, private development.
Private?
My, my.
Is he here?
He's in the back garden, behind the house.
Thank you.
I'm sorry about your dad.
Thanks.
Hey, you got any boxes?
I'm running out.
No.
You could get them at the supermarket.
They have them in the back.
It must be hard packing up all this stuff, huh?
Yeah, a lot of work.
No, I meant the--
never mind.
Oh my gosh, I haven't seen of those in a billion years.
Oh yeah.
That was my father's.
He loved it.
You want it?
What?
Well, I'm just going to take all this stuff down and give it
away.
If you see anything you like, just take it.
How could you give this away?
I don't like hanging on to a lot of stuff.
I travel light.
This is a piece of your family.
It's just a thing.
No, it's your history.
Well, what am I supposed to do with it?
You keep it.
You put it in the attic.
And?
And I don't know, your kids throw it away.
I don't know.
It's your roots.
Maybe everybody doesn't want to be rooted,
ever think about that?
Look, I work in the vineyard.
All I know is you don't have roots, you die.
Yeah, vineyards.
Come here, I want you to taste something.
My father, he had two passions, his opera and his wine,
his special wine, which he made just for us.
Every Christmas, we had a special wine.
You want to taste it?
Sure.
Get a glass.
You get that?
A hint of vanilla and strawberry, slight oak.
A hint of chocolate.
Tastes like goat piss, doesn't it?
Yeah, poor guy.
Grew the best grapes in the world,
couldn't make wine to save his soul.
That was really terrible.
He was sweet, though.
Uncle Nick's in the garden.
[GROANS]
Mr. Di Cenzo?
NICK DI CENZO: [SPEAKING ITALIAN]
Look, I'm not changing my mind.
You seem like a nice girl, but what you ask, I cannot do.
My mother, Alicia, thought that you should have this.
She say anything else?
Um.
She-- she said you should have this.
She thought that this you should have,
was what she was thinking.
You have this.
Yes.
She was very beautiful.
She still is.
A beautiful person, I mean.
Well, gotta run now, doctor's orders.
You know, I was hoping that now we could
just put this all behind us.
And I'm sorry about that misunderstanding
with the investment group.
We do have partners and we really want to buy this land.
You want to buy this place?
Absolutely.
OK, I'll sell it to you on one condition.
OK.
Alicia wants me to have the ring?
She must hand it to me, from her hand to mine,
as she should have done 40 years ago.
Um, Mr. Di Cenzo--
She must come to me and put it in my hand.
When she does that, I'll sell you the land.
Well, that's enough for one day.
I need a nap.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
It's simple.
Hand the guy the ring and we buy the land.
You're absolutely right, Brian, except that you're
wrong because it's my mom.
Nothing is simple.
So get your dad to handle it.
If my dad ever thought he was her second choice, my god,
it would break his heart.
No, this is between these two nut jobs.
Then why are we meeting with the kid?
He called.
There's something about the deal he wants to discuss.
What deal?
We don't have a deal.
Maybe he has a solution.
Hi.
We're meeting Tony Di Cenzo.
Hey, come here.
You must be Brian.
Hi.
You're the prenup guy.
This is Mike.
He owns the place. This is Sarah.
This is Brian. I'm Tony.
This is a fish.
What are you doing?
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
You speak Russian?
Funny.
If you spoke Russian, you wouldn't
understand a word I'm saying.
Mike just loves me, unconditionally.
This guy, we work together.
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
No.
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
Sorry.
What Mike does to fish, they jump in the boat
if they hear he's cooking.
I get the fish.
He gets the girl.
Go sit down.
I'm going to cook your lunch.
It will knock off your rice.
[LAUGHS]
The terms of the investment banker,
I mean, what do they mean, really?
I like to think of myself as kind of a profit psychologist.
Everyone has it in them to make money.
The question is, what is it that holds you back?
I just spend it all.
I mean, that's what it's for, right?
So?
- What? - The fish.
Did I tell you?
I know, it's incredible.
It's like a balsamic-- - Reduction.
What is that--
Thyme.
That's amazing.
Amazing.
Yeah, very good.
I'm like a GPS system for finance.
You just punch in where you want to be and I help you get there.
Tony.
Hey.
How are you?
When did you get back into town?
A couple weeks ago.
You look terrific.
That's good, right?
Give me a call.
My home number's on the back.
Absolutely. I will.
I will.
It's great seeing you.
I have no idea who that was.
You're my hero.
Brian.
Sara tells me you wanted to talk to us
about the nonexistent deal.
It's about the house.
What are your plans for it?
We were thinking of gutting it and building
a storage facility.
I was wondering if we could just leave the house out
of the nonexistent deal.
Well, we'd have to reduce the price per acre.
We don't really need the house, though.
Is that necessary?
The deal included the existing structure.
Well, I mean, it's not really a structure.
It's a house.
Honey, I've represented this deal a certain way
to the investors.
You could just go back to them.
Can we discuss this later?
Yeah, you two discuss it.
You get back to me.
[PHONE RINGING]
Sorry, I gotta take this.
This is Brian.
He's really quite thorough.
Yes.
You know, he knows his stuff.
Yeah.
Brian and a blueberry, lethal.
A blueberry. [LAUGHS]
You know, berry thing.
Whatever it is.
You've got that feeling?
What's that?
A meal like this, all is right with the world.
I have no idea.
- Yup. - Come on.
Where?
We've got to kiss the chef, tradition.
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
- So? - Just terrible.
We hated it.
Hey, basta.
I don't make food.
I make love.
Hey, I helped with the fish.
Out.
Out of my kitchen.
Back to table.
I make you special flan.
Hey, where did you two disappear to?
Flan.
He's making us a special flan.
Oh.
That sounds great.
Wait, just wait.
Brian, you were going to tell us that thing
about the softened dollar.
The softened dollar has put the import
wine business into a slump.
Bad for us.
No.
No, that's good for us.
That's what I meant.
More wine?
Yes.
ALICIA ROSA ANSELMI: You what? - We kissed.
What?
You kissed him, he kissed you?
Everybody was kissing everybody.
I don't know, we just kind of mashed together.
What's wrong with you?
What is wrong with you?
You're acting like a crazy person.
You're engaged to Brian, for God's sake.
Yeah, I know that.
You think I don't know that?
I am telling you, these Di Cenzo men, they are bad news.
Bad news.
You got to get rid of this one like I
got rid of the other one.
I got news for you, Ma.
You didn't get rid of anything.
What are you talking about?
He won't take the ring.
He says if you want to give it back to him,
you got to put it in his hand in person
or he's not going to sell us the land.
[SPEAKING ITALIAN]
You go tell that son of a gun that you--
Hey Ma, forget it.
Forget that.
No, I've got enough problems of my own.
I got the ring.
I got the kiss.
Oh.
Oh my god.
Don't you see?
What?
Like a big red sign in front of my nose.
This is it.
This is what?
You and Tony, me and Nick.
God is saying, stay away.
Stay away.
Ma, we can't do that.
We need the land.
No.
The Di Cenzos are bad luck for us.
They want to curse us, but I curse them.
Look.
All you gotta do is take this ring
and put it in the guy's hand.
I don't understand what the big--
Ma, do you still have feelings for this guy?
What about dad?
May God, right this minute, inflict me
with an incurable physical condition if I
ever, for one minute, was unfaithful to your father.
That's not what I asked.
[SPEAKING ITALIAN] That's enough.
We will not buy this land.
We will have no dealings with these people.
That's my final word.
That's it.
[PHONE RINGING]
Hello?
SARA ROSA ANSELMI [ON TELEPHONE]: Hi.
Tony, it's Sara Anselmi.
TONY DI CENZO [ON TELEPHONE]: Yeah, I knew it was you.
Oh, you know, that is just the kind of thing you
say that really puts me off.
What?
SARA ROSA ANSELMI [ON TELEPHONE]: Yeah.
Yeah, that you were certain that I was going to call,
like I'm one of those girls who, I'm sure,
calls you in the middle of the night.
Your name came up on my phone.
Oh.
Well, I'm calling to tell you that my mother has joined
the ranks of absolutely not.
- Absolutely? - Not.
Yes.
Why?
You don't need to know that, we just need to fix it.
TONY DI CENZO [ON TELEPHONE]: How?
SARA ROSA ANSELMI [ON TELEPHONE]:
You just get your uncle to sign, I'll take care of my mother.
Look, I'll come over.
We'll powwow.
Absolutely not.
Oh, the family motto.
Come on, we'll drink a bottle of wine.
We'll figure this out.
Look, I just called you to tell you that my mother is not
cooperating.
If you need companionship tonight,
maybe you should call that little number
from the restaurant.
That bothers you, huh?
No, it didn't bother me.
TONY DI CENZO [ON TELEPHONE]: You know,
I forgot all about that girl, but that's
an excellent idea, though.
Yeah, well, I'm sure that's not an exclusive club.
Ooh.
Last chance.
I could be over in 10 minutes. - Family motto.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[LAUGHS]
What is that?
A little pre-wedding gift.
I just delivered it.
You like it?
Yeah, thanks.
[YAWNING] It's very big.
I made coffee.
Great.
I didn't sleep at all last night.
I can't believe this whole deal is going up in smoke.
There'll be other land we can buy.
When I get back from New York, we'll start over.
You're going to New York?
You're not my only client, you know, just my favorite.
HDTV for satellite speakers, send to speaker.
Power subwoofer.
It's all color bars and tones.
When we get the cable set up, it'll be awesome.
Man, I'm loving this.
Yes.
Hi.
Whoa.
[SPEAKING ITALIAN] What is this, a special occasion?
No.
I was just--
Johnny, I've been thinking.
We shouldn't buy the land, the Di Cenzos'.
Why not?
It's too risky.
Risky for who?
For all of us.
You told Sara?
Yeah.
OK.
Yeah.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Are you OK?
Yeah, I'm fine.
Are you OK?
Yeah, I'm fine.
We're fine.
What about Brian?
Is he fine?
Brian's fine.
We're all fine.
Yeah, good for us.
Yeah.
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
Good, Johnny.
Good.
It's hot weather, though.
Pushes things along.
We're ready, señor.
OK, well, let's get the crews in.
Time to harvest them.
Bueno.
[OPERA MUSIC PLAYING]
SARA ROSA ANSELMI [ON TELEPHONE]: Hello?
Hello?
Brandon, if this is you again, I'm going to call the cops.
Hello?
What? What?
Who is it?
I don't want the scaloppine.
NICK DI CENZO: What?
I don't want the scaloppine.
Don't worry, don't worry.
You're not getting anywhere near my scaloppine.
Come on. Get up.
We're going to the lawyer's office,
we're signing the papers.
Enough of this craziness.
We are selling this place to the Rosas.
Bite your tongue.
They are willing to let me keep the house.
- You want the house? - Yeah.
You don't want the house.
I want the house.
Why all of a sudden do you want the house?
I don't know.
I just-- I just want the house.
What the hell is wrong with you?
It's 10 o'clock in the morning.
You're barging in here like a maniac.
You have one lunch with the girl and all of a sudden--
What?
Look at me.
Ow.
Uncle Nick.
It's the girl.
These Rosa women are devils, she devils.
What the hell are you talking about?
It's like a worm in your heart that eats like a parasite.
No.
Basta.
Enough.
You see, your brain is clouded by these--
these Rosa women, like sirens.
You must stuff your ears with wax.
What?
That woman ate my soul.
She's not going to sit on my family's land to digest it.
I say no.
We will never sell this land to the Rosas.
[SPANISH MUSIC PLAYING]
[SPEAKING SPANISH]
There you go. Chili or refried?
Where's your plate?
I'm looking for Sara.
You're the nephew, the kisser.
I'm Tony.
Mrs. Anselmi.
Sara's gone.
Do you know when she'll be back?
Never. She went on a cruise.
She died.
She went on a cruise and then she died.
She's out of touch.
You have no business being here.
Have a nice day.
Chili or refried?
I really need to talk to her.
We don't want your land.
The deal is off.
Now, you got to go because I got to sprinkle this whole place
with holy water.
I really need to talk to Sara.
I am asking you to leave.
If my dog was here, I'd sick him come on you.
I've got a parakeet.
He's got a tiny, little sharp beak.
Don't make me get ugly.
I'm warning you, Ma.
Don't pick now to start talking.
I'm in no mood.
Chili or refried?
Hey, you one of the guys Victor sent over?
What?
We could use you up in the west corner.
Go up, ask for Sara.
She'll show you what to do.
OK, thank you.
WORKER: Dios mio.
[SPANISH MUSIC PLAYING]
[SPEAKING SPANISH]
Sara?
Yeah?
I need to talk to you.
Go away.
Listen.
Your mother sicking a parakeet on me.
My uncle is slapping my face and stuffing his ears with wax.
What the hell is going on? - Ask your uncle.
I'm asking you because you know and he won't talk.
All right, my mother and your uncle have a--
a history.
What history?
You know what?
If you're not going to leave, then pick.
What history?
Ask him about a ring. Something happened.
She ate his soul.
So that's what happened.
And by the way, something happened between you and I.
40 years ago, your uncle sent a ring and a proposal
of marriage to my mother, and nothing
happened between you and I.
My uncle? Marriage?
No way.
It got lost in the mail.
Wow, 40 years.
Well, two days ago, you kissed me in the kitchen.
What your uncle doesn't know is that the ring
didn't arrive until last week.
And by the way, I didn't kiss you.
You kissed me.
Ha, and there's nothing going on between you and I?
Don't you "ha" me, OK?
Listen, I'm not going to pretend that I'm not
a little, you know, puzzled by events that may
or may not have taken place.
Back there.
You get back on your side.
Stay on your own side.
Your uncle doesn't know that the ring was lost.
Puzzled, huh?
He thinks my mother rejected him after all these years.
Are you in love with Brian?
Your uncle is insisting that my mother
put this ring in his hand.
As well she should.
Are you in love with Brian?
She is never going to do that, and I am going to marry Brian,
and you're going to do whatever the hell it is you're
going to do.
And the only problem we have here
is how to settle this opera between your uncle
and my mother.
Would you your voice down.
My father is right over there. - Stop.
Basta.
OK.
My mother, who was a very wise person, always knew what to do,
no matter what.
Death, tragedy, she always had the right words to say.
- And they are? - Let's eat.
ALICIA ROSA ANSELMI: A lunch with the Di Cenzos?
SARA ROSA ANSELMI: Yeah, how does that sound?
ALICIA ROSA ANSELMI: Like I'd rather rip
out my own teeth with pliers. - Ma.
No.
Listen.
I've made my feelings perfectly clear on this matter.
You know, the world is full of land.
It's made of it, for God's sakes.
I'm sure some place, some of it, that does not have the Di Cenzo
curse on it must be for sale.
The answer is no, Sara.
Never in a--
Million years.
If they were serving that woman's head
on a silver platter, I would not sit
down to lunch with the Rosas.
Uncle Nick, they're willing to let us keep the house and two
acres for the same price.
Forget it.
You know, I'm glad my father's not here to see this.
Father?
He hated the Rosas, too.
Yeah, but he didn't fear them.
Fear?
Me?
Afraid of the Rosas.
Are you out of your mind?
I'm not afraid of anything.
You'll just have to get your grapes someplace else.
It's not about the grapes, Ma.
I'm sorry, Sara.
You cannot ask me to do this.
What are you doing?
I was just going through old junk.
I should really throw some of this stuff away.
Let me see.
Come on, let me see.
Come on.
Oh, I remember this.
The hayride.
I don't know why we just don't get rid of these things.
They collect dust.
Look at this, look at this.
It's junior Christmas world.
It's you and Nick.
The two of you would walk into a room and sparks
would fill the air.
The way you looked at him, god, I wish I
could see that look just once.
But hey, you can't control the way
people who love you love you.
You just love them the best way you can.
Johnny.
No.
Alicia, from the first minute I saw you,
I never had any doubts that I was the right person for you.
And I thought that you never had any doubts, either, until now.
Because if you love me without question,
you could sit down at a table and have lunch with anyone
without fear.
Yeah.
Sara, you got the number that expensive hairdresser in town?
Serafina?
Yeah.
I want you to call her first thing in the morning.
Call her?
Why?
Just call her.
First thing.
Oh, thank God.
OK.
Now, for a moment, we have to put everything aside.
I mean, the land deal is important, yes.
But the situation with your mother, my uncle, crucial.
You and me, OK, OK.
The point is in this place now, everything in our lives
that has led to this moment, what we say next is vital.
Antipasto, clams. - Oysters.
Baked clams.
Oysters á la mode de [INAUDIBLE]..
OK.
Cold salmon foam, mushrooms, [INAUDIBLE]..
Not bad.
I know.
Sautéed turkey breast stuffed with
bruschetta and gorgonzola and--
Say it.
White truffles.
[SINGING] Your lips tell me, baby, I love you,
but your stomach is making a growl.
You say you want me for all your days.
- Oh, that's strong. - Oh.
[INAUDIBLE]
Oh yeah.
[SINGING] Then you kiss me with all your soul
while you softly whisper, pasta fazol.
Oh, very impressive.
She doesn't like it.
You don't need the clams.
I need the oyster.
All right, mussels.
Can we compromise on mussels?
Clam, the clam.
Here we go.
[SINGING] I need a man with an appetite.
You will abandon all control when you
get a little taste of my fazol.
I see that you're starting to tremble.
I see that you give me the look.
I see that your mouth starts to water because you
see that I'm starting to cook.
Thomas, go down there.
You want that one or--
Well listen, you know what?
No, no, go--
[INAUDIBLE] Here, I'm opening this thing.
Here we go. SARA ROSA ANSELMI: Are you sure?
All right. Here, weigh this.
What does it weigh?
- It's very heavy. - Enough?
- I think that's enough. - Enough?
OK, good. Here.
We'll take it.
[SINGING] I say manja, baby.
Ooh, you hungry yet?
And when it's time to say good night.
Good day.
[SINGING] I'll feed your [INAUDIBLE] appetite.
And if you want a second date, be prepared to finish
everything on your plate.
TONY DI CENZO: We should probably
start cooking around 9:00.
I could do some of the prep tonight.
Yeah, so 9:00.
Yeah, OK.
I'll just bring the wine with me tomorrow.
I can get it now, if you want.
Oh, um.
Oh, no, no. You know what?
You just-- - No, no.
It's all right. Yeah, it's inside.
- You sure? - Mhm.
- Really? - Yeah, come on in.
OK.
I'll be right back.
Hey, classy joint.
Yes, it's a classy joint.
It's the original farmhouse, built in 1883.
19th century TV?
Oh, Brian gave me that TV.
For what?
Nothing.
You know, he's just like that, sweet.
It's very big.
It's a space station.
What's this?
Oh, this is what I wanted to serve tomorrow, if you like it.
It's mine.
It's a Caberlot blend.
Well, the cab is ours and the lot is from your place.
You stole our grapes?
No, I had my foreman buy it from your foreman.
We had to sneak it so my mom wouldn't find out.
Smuggled him in, I felt like a drug dealer.
This is the blend of our two families.
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
Oh my god.
What?
This is not my father's wine.
But it's your father's grapes.
Sara, you must know how good this is.
I-- I had an idea, yeah.
I'll show you something.
This is really quite extraordinary, darling.
Oh, thank you.
Here, look.
You'll love this.
What, your family?
Mug shots.
This little girl in this picture, that's my Nana.
And that's my great Uncle Pete.
He had a metal plate in his head.
War?
Sawmill.
We used to put magnets on it when he was sleeping.
That's evil.
There's my great aunt Nettie.
And look, just cousins, cousins, cousins.
Sequels.
I would've had you pegged for that.
Husband, 12 kids, Miss 4-H.
Oh, well, I was Miss 4-H. And I was married before,
just for a second.
It was this crazy on again, off again thing, very tempestuous.
Boy, I'd would love to see you tempestuous.
Well, it just got to the point where
we were either going to kill each other or get married,
so we got married.
I should have killed him.
That explains the flat screen.
I like that TV.
Oh, look at that.
There's my Nana's brother, Ropo.
So what's your story?
My story?
I ain't got no story.
Everybody has a story.
I got a lot of stories, but none that I'm
going to share with you.
Like your uncle, huh?
Well, you know what they say, you don't
make the same mistake once.
It's not always a mistake.
Right, Miss Tempestuous.
Well, my parents are happy.
Weren't yours?
They endured, worked hard, made a family.
They didn't expect much.
Here's the picture I want to show you.
More dead people?
Look.
Who are they?
That's our family, the Rosas and the Di Cenzos,
right after they moved from Colombia, right
after they bought the land.
That's my great grandfather.
That's our first Christmas dinner together.
La familia.
Yeah, well, I'm going to--
I'll just-- - OK.
OK.
So--
Tomorrow?
Yes, tomorrow.
OK.
The wine.
Right.
Al.
Al. - Yeah.
My shampoo, do you know where it is?
Look under the sink.
What's this?
Oh, I'm--
I'm making a little something for the lunch.
Oh.
What are you wearing?
I don't know.
I hadn't even thought about it, really.
What about something dressy casual,
like your new sport coat?
Yeah, yeah.
That'd be good.
Johnny.
Hey, I've got to take a shower.
Under the sink you said, right?
Yeah.
Come on, baby.
Mama needs vineyard.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Need you a minute.
Can't you just wait?
Sara.
You know frankly, I think this whole thing
is a big waste of time.
Geez.
You just got to get her to give him the ring
and everybody's going to be happy
and everything's going to work out.
Well, it would work out for him.
That's mine.
What does that mean?
They're going to be here any minute.
It means-- what is in it for her?
Why are you rolling the focaccia?
You're telling me how to make focaccia?
I worked at [INAUDIBLE] Oil.
They use too much garlic.
Brian's sensitive to garlic.
Brian?
Yeah, I told you he was coming.
No, you didn't.
Is that a problem?
No.
Just set another place.
Are you watching the sauce?
Yes, I am watching the sauce.
You know what?
Why don't you just roll your focaccia, all right?
And I'll make my tiramisu bianco.
How's that?
So this is what we have to do.
I'm going to get my mom to come into the kitchen.
Then you've got to come up with some excuse
to get your uncle to come in.
Why don't we just do it at the table?
We can't do that.
My father, that would be so humiliating.
OK, OK. I get it.
I get it.
Check the veal, will you?
Oh my god.
It's ruined.
It's all ruined.
What, the veal?
My life.
Don't do that.
I thought you meant the veal.
I'm talking about my life.
I had my wine and my Brian and my big TV.
You hate the big TV.
I didn't know I did.
And now I do, and so now it's all ruined.
Sara.
Don't you come near me.
This is your fault.
My fault?
Yes.
You just waltz right in here and you ruin my life,
and now when this is all over, you're
just going to waltz out again.
- You don't know that. - What?
What?
Mr. I don't need any roots?
What, are you going to open your restaurant here?
Where?
In this house?
In this house that you want, but you don't want?
This house is my restaurant.
Yeah, like that's going to happen.
Maybe I will.
Maybe I'll do just that. - No, you won't.
Yes, I will.
Don't you dare.
I thought you wanted--
No, no, no, no, no.
What, do you think I want you here
with your your stupid rolled up focaccia
and the way you make me laugh and--
OK.
You don't want me to stay.
You don't want me to go.
What the hell do you want?
I want you to have never come back here at all.
But I did, so that is off the table.
So now, what do you want now?
You're burning the sauce.
What do you want now?
I just want to cancel this lunch.
I just don't want to be here.
I don't know.
[CRYING]
Sara.
Shhh.
[CAR HONKING]
Go, go, go, go.
I'll be right behind you.
[PHONE RINGING]
This is Brian.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Mrs. Anselmi.
Thank you for inviting us to your home.
My pleasure.
Ma, you look amazing.
[INAUDIBLE] Sarah, wipe that look off your face.
Your fiancé is coming.
What's wrong with both of you?
Mm, something smells great.
- Hey, Brian. - Hi, Tony.
How are you?
Good, how are you doing?
You know Johnny.
Mr. Anselmi.
Call me Johnny, please.
This is my mother-in-law.
Mrs. Rosa, how are you?
She doesn't speak.
OK, please, please.
Everyone, please, come in.
Come in.
Can I get anyone a drink?
Mrs. Anselmi?
I'll have a wine.
Ciao.
[INAUDIBLE] Oh, Alicia.
You look exactly as I remember you.
I remember you taller.
Johnny.
You look terrific.
You, too, Nick.
It's been too long.
A matter of opinion.
I love your jewelry, Alicia.
Oh, so many ring.
Nick, I want to introduce you to my fiancé, Brian.
Oh, ciao, Brian.
Hi, Nick.
How are you?
And you remember my grandmother.
She doesn't talk.
I figured because no one's threatened to drive
a nail through my eye yet.
OK, this is going well.
Please, sit down, Mrs. Anselmi.
Look, I feel I can speak freely
here as the only outsider.
Rosa, I know you have old differences,
but I think we all share one common goal.
So I'm asking you to please try and set those differences
aside, if not for your own peace of mind, then for me and Sara.
Boy, are you in for an interesting afternoon.
Brian, sit down.
Oh.
Here we go.
Thank you.
Sorry.
OK.
Well, let's eat.
Food.
[INAUDIBLE] pepperoni [INAUDIBLE]..
Well, I suppose we should drink to something.
I can't imagine anything we could all agree on.
A la familia.
Salud.
What is this?
It's Sara's, Sara's wine.
Pretty good.
Pretty good?
It's brilliant.
My daughter's wine is brilliant.
It's extraordinary.
That's what I said.
It's pretty good.
Well, the food is all Tony's.
Very nice.
I'm not hungry.
Ma.
It looks great, honey.
You're not hungry, either.
Well, I have a thing about other people's kitchens.
You don't know what goes on in other people's kitchens.
They cook, right?
You think so.
Ma.
I'm going to eat.
Me, too.
Ma, I said no.
So Nick, how long has it been?
It must be, what, 40 years?
So what's new?
40 years, everything.
Everything.
[LAUGHS]
Remember that guy who was in shop with us, Eddie Poulsen?
Yeah, the guy with the lisp, right?
No, that was Eddie Bercik.
Eddie Poulsen had the wooden leg.
No, no, no, no.
That was Ted Winslow.
Who was Eddie Bercik?
He had the sister.
No, that was Footsie Longo.
Footsie Longo, that's the guy.
That's the guy who was in shop with us.
- So what about him? - He died.
- No. - Yeah.
- Oh. - What's wrong with you guys?
Footsie Longo isn't dead.
Dead as Julius Caesar.
Is Footsie short for something?
Yeah, Alfonzo.
Look at this guy, look at him.
He still hates to be wrong.
Remember the spelling bee?
Yeah.
Remember how you got second prize?
So mad you got because Johnny got first prize.
Johnny always got first prize.
I got second prize.
Johnny got the booby prize.
- What? - What?
- He's done all right. - What?
Who?
Alfonzo Longo, two years ago.
What?
Do you got dead people in there.
Brian, they don't want information.
They just want to argue.
OK No, I googled him.
You googled Footsie Longo.
What the hell does that mean?
It means he's dead and I'm right.
Ha ha.
Footsie Longo is dead.
[MOCKING]
The [INAUDIBLE] is wonderful.
Hm, isn't it wonderful, dad?
Wonderful.
Sara and I did it together.
Oh my god.
The antipasto.
Would you join me in the kitchen please?
For what?
So I can slit my wrists.
Excuse me.
Can you google anybody in there
or do you have to know them?
Did you see that?
She gave him the look.
Uncle Nick, I need your moment.
I'm eating.
You know mother, you can be a royal pain in the butt.
Oh, what did I do?
Well, everything but stab him with your fork.
Well, the day is young.
I need to talk to you.
I need the little girl's room.
I'll find it myself.
Don't go.
Uncle Nick.
What the hell kind of a lunch is this anyway?
- What is going on? - What?
You wouldn't tell me.
You think I can't see it?
What are you, nuts?
What's going on in there?
Am I?
The horns, they want me to wear the horns, huh?
Well, am I?
Sara, where's your--
sorry, we'll come back.
Is there something going on between the two of you?
Between us?
Something I should know about?
I better-- bathroom.
My mother's in the bathroom.
I'll use the one upstairs.
Uncle Nick, do not leave the house.
Tony, why don't you get the string beans?
Is anyone going to answer me?
Where's your mother?
She's in the bathroom.
Well, where's Nick?
He's in the bathroom.
They're both in the bathroom?
Excuse me, Tony.
I'm sorry, what was the question?
Is there something going on between you and Sara?
I think you should talk to Sara.
Well, that's a yes.
It's not.
Take the bread.
Well, is it a no?
Well, it's not a yes.
Look, Brian, there are no simple yeses
and there are no simple nos.
Then what is there?
There's veal.
Sautéed with sage and white wine.
Hey, what the hell are you doing?
I took a pee.
Where's Alicia?
Hey, she's your wife.
That's right. That's right.
She's my wife.
Look at the old lady.
She eats like she's going to the chair.
Uncle Nick, I need you in the kitchen.
I was just in the kitchen.
Well, we're going back.
Oh my [SPEAKING ITALIAN]
No, sit.
Good.
Now, before Johnny gets back.
What before Johnny gets back?
Isn't there something you want to give to Nick?
Yeah, typhus.
Yeah, something you should have returned years ago.
Hm?
Something you'd like to place in my hand?
Happy?
Johnny, let's go.
I do not wear the horns.
You don't wear the horns?
What horns?
The man who wears the horns is a man with an unfaithful woman.
Oh god, I'm wearing the horns.
No, Brian, you're not wearing the horns.
But I don't wear the horns because I know--
I know about the ring.
I know about the proposal.
I know.
Oh my god.
What is it with you people?
This is not an opera.
It was a simple postal error.
A postal error?
Brian, shut up.
The package was lost in the mail.
It happens.
- What package? - Nothing.
Brian.
Alicia's package, with the ring and the proposal.
Brian, zip it.
She didn't get it till last week.
I thought we were all talking about the same thing.
Aren't we?
Aha.
NANA [VOICEOVER]: There was a saying in my village
when I was a girl, that love is like wine.
Just enough makes happiness, too much makes a fool.
Aha.
What?
You never got it.
I knew it.
You knew what?
So I didn't get it.
So I got it last week.
A little time.
The answer would have been the same.
Tell me that.
Uncle Nick, come on.
No, no, no.
Tell me that now, in front of God and all these people,
you would've said no.
I'm not going to answer that question.
That is a ridiculous question.
I'm not going to dignify it with an answer.
Ma, Nick, can't you both--
Sara.
Answer the question.
What?
For 40 years, I wake up.
I ask myself the same question.
40 years.
Now I would like an answer.
You, Johnny?
After 40 years of marriage, after all we've shared,
you want words?
I want words.
I can think of two.
Ma, dad.
Sara.
Wait a minute.
I want what's mine.
What?
The ring.
If you're not going to accept it,
I want it returned from your hand to mine.
It's a point of honor.
You wouldn't know honor if it bit you on the--
Ma.
Whatever.
I want my ring.
Please.
Please, give him the ring.
Stay out of it.
Give him the damn ring, Ma.
Stay out of it.
The ring.
Sara;s got it.
Yeah, I-- wait, I put it on my--
oh my god, I lost it.
You lost it?
I should have expected it.
Lost again.
I see.
You Rosa women are all the same.
You have a piece of a man's soul and you throw it away.
I know what you mean.
You're crazy, you know that?
You're crazy.
She lost it.
You know, Johnny owes me a big thank you.
Thanks to me, he finally sees what kind of woman he married.
Well, some things don't change.
Uncle Nick, you OK?
What?
A loaf of bread.
She hit me with a shovel once.
Excuse me.
This is silk.
Well, that was successful.
Did anyone think the veal was a little dry?
At least my wine was a big hit.
Sara, we should go.
I can't.
You can't?
My family is falling apart, don't you see?
Yeah.
Yeah, I see.
Maybe you should go after him.
You know, I don't need you telling me what to do.
OK.
Buon appetito.
Brian.
Brian, where are you going?
I see the way you look at him.
A blind man could see it.
No, wait a minute.
Why can't you just admit you have feelings for him?
All right. All right.
I have feelings for him.
How can you say that?
Brian.
No, no.
I'm not as strong a man as your father.
I can't wait 50 years, hoping that one day you'll
look at me in the same way.
I don't know what to say.
Before we were engaged, we were friends, right?
And friends are supposed to want the best for their friends.
Oh god.
I just want to have my mother's energy.
50 years from now when you come for lunch,
I just want it to be lunch.
OK.
I want my TV back, you hear me?
It's mine and I want it back.
OK.
[PHONE RINGING]
You couldn't find him?
Who, Johnny?
No.
I don't know where the hell he went.
If you don't mind, I'd like to be alone now.
He'll come back.
He was like this, remember?
He'd run off and brood and then he'd come back.
That Johnny.
Me, I didn't come back.
Why?
I was a kid.
So were you.
Who knows why kids do anything?
You want the truth?
Yeah.
I was scared.
I was scared if I came back, I'd never be able to leave again.
I need this place.
It was never me.
We would never have been happy here.
I know.
You meant a lot to me.
You meant a lot to me, Nickie.
You were my first crush, my first love.
You taught me how to love, Nick.
In spite of everything, Nick, you were a gift in my life.
And you in mine.
Get your hands off of my wife.
Johnny, it's not what it looks like.
[GRUNTING]
Johnny.
You fought for me.
I think I fell on my keys.
You risked your life for me.
Risked his life?
I'm 65 years old.
It takes me 20 minutes to get up in the morning and take a leak.
[LAUGHS]
Oh, Johnny.
Alicia, you're giving me the look.
Oh, Johnny.
[LAUGHS]
[SINGING IN ITALIAN]
[LAUGHS]
Sara.
Say something.
How did it go with Brian?
Yeah, how did it go with Brian?
Is that all you can say?
It's not all, it's just what I'm saying now.
Oh, sorry.
Wow, that's rough.
He's a good guy.
Sorry.
Yeah, sorry.
Right.
I-- wow.
I didn't mean, you know, to--
No.
You are not to blame.
No, you're not the disease.
You're a symptom of the disease.
That's good to know.
You don't have to feel any sense of--
Obligation?
Obligation, thank you.
Also, don't feel like you have to come up
with any magical words of consolation,
or don't feel guilty about this because it's not your fault.
Sara, shut up.
Sorry.
OK.
I don't know how I feel.
I mean, I thought this might happen,
and I kind of hoped-- you know, I guessed it would happen.
But now that it's happening, I guess I--
I-- I mean, it's happening, right?
Yeah, it's happening.
Yeah, OK. How do you feel?
I don't know.
Tony, I feel--
I feel like I have to go home.
[LAUGHS]
The guy decided to bury it in the garage
so he wouldn't find it.
And then your father went into garage, the floor caved in
and he's staying on the roof of the car.
[LAUGHS]
Oh, Sarah, your desert is beautiful.
Oh, honey, it looks delicious.
I can't wait.
What the hell is going on?
What?
Ten minutes ago, you all wanted to kill each other.
Oh, we worked it out.
Worked it out?
Sara, Tony, we want you to know that we talked,
and the land, everything you want, is all fine.
We're going to sign the papers tomorrow, first thing.
And Sara, just go make your wine.
[APPLAUSE]
[SCREAMS]
Honey, honey, are you OK?
Are you all right? - What?
What is it?
Where is Brian?
Trouble. Trouble.
- Don't start. - The kisser.
It's the kisser. - I didn't do anything.
Don't start.
Don't you start throwing accusations.
Accusations.
You'll be lucky if that's all I throw.
Little girl, cut the cake.
Ma, you haven't said a word in 20 years.
Now you speak?
I want the cake.
OK.
Who gets it?
[CHEERING]
[CHRISTMAS MUSIC PLAYING]
[LAUGHS]
That looks delicious.
Oh, that looks great.
Of course, my nephew-- - Happy holidays.
How's everybody doing over here?
Wonderful.
Are you enjoying the wine?
We are featuring our Caberlot blend.
Have a little more.
Congratulations.
There were once two fools named Sara and Tony.
[CHATTER]
NANA: And their families were neighboring
vineyards in America.
They joined their lands and made great food, and especially
a wonderful wine.
And as we all know, what is in the soil is in the grape,
and what what is in the grape is in the wine,
and what is in the wine is in our hearts.
Salude amore.
[MUSIC PLAYING]